The Gallery - The Twiglet Manifesto

It is week 29 of the Gallery, and Tara has set us some tricky challenges over those 29 weeks. This week was easy for me. When I gave up smoking (5 years and 21 days ago - not that I am counting) I developed a new habit/love.

Twiglets.

I have a bag a night. Sometimes two. They are yummy and only 90 calories per little bag.

Now I realise this is controversial, and they are basically the biscuity Marmite equivalent (like that too). So I expect strong reactions.

However, I have made this special message just for Tara. She threatened me with a ban from the Gallery if I did Twiglets (it's almost like she doesn't recognise them as food????) - which under equality and diversity laws (and I have an NVQ 2 in this) I find Twigletist. And no one likes a Twigletist.

So I think Tara needs to think about what she has said and feel the love for the poor, Twiglet. It is a food and should have it's rightful place in the food chain. Up the Twiglet revolution my brothers and sisters! Join me and you too could have a bag (maybe two) of Twiglets a night



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Oh and when I finished all this I had this.

A lovely cup of coffee.

Things I have said to my daughters today

I have blatently stolen this idea from Tara at Stickyfingers who was inspired by Millennium housewife

Here are the many and varied things that I have said to my beautiful, well behaved charming girls today.

• Lola, please stop wearing my boots you'll fall ov...Oh  dear.
• Heather, use a tissue, don't do what you've just done..that's disgusting.
• Stop making yourself straight (whilst trying to lift Lola out of a shopping trolley)
• Lola NO. You are covered in flour...
• I am glad you like girls best...(then as an after thought)..but if you liked boys best that would be OK too.
• Heather, please...just look where you're going, No, fine, just walk behind me then!
• Lola stop being Mummy
• Yes Boba Fett is Daddy's favourite....(from the Kitchen, No actually it's Hans Solo)
• (to both) Please put some clothes on...(anyone who knows my children will realise this is not unusual)
• Lola please stop using Mummy as a tissue.
• Heather stop touching everything
• Heather stop picking up everything
• Heather stop running up and down the travelator
• Heather that's dangerous
• Heather yes, we will do biscuits, but only when Mummy has had coffee...
• Yes we can watch Alvin and the Chipmunks but Mummy needs to make a coffee first
• Heather don't do the farting noise with your armpit..it is not funny in any universe.

Trying to do something with my Monday

OK I have compressed my hours at work so I have Monday off. This was so that I can take my eldest daughter to school one day a week, save a bit of money on the childminder and have some 'me' time.

Tomorrow is my third Monday.

So far my Monday's have gone like this:

Monday Number One - Had a really horrible cold and if I wasn't off anyway, would have been off sick. Harumph.

Monday Number Two - Really horrible cold was still with me so much of the day was spent on the sofa - although I did update my Christmas spreadsheet, which cheered me up a bit. (OK, OK I know that sounds exceptionally nerdy...nope, searching for excuses on this one, I have none. Hi, my name is Jane and I am a nerd).

Monday Number Three - Right this is tomorrow...Here are my ongoing plans for the 6 hours I have to myself:

1. Write my masterpiece (I anticipate this will take a few Monday's. I am realistic I can't complete this on the one day)
2. Wrap aforementioned Christmas Presents (preferably whilst listening to the Ratpack singing Christmas tunes with cinnamon scented candles smelling lovely and maybe a smidge of mulled wine)
3. Remove and dismantel the cupboard in the bathroom whose base is rotting from too much bath water spilling and soaking into it.
4. Remove broken sofa, mattress and travel cot from spare bedroom.
5. Move daughters bookcase as have realised that there is a better place for it which would give them more room in their bedroom.
6. Put up picture that has been down since the loft was done. (In April)
7. Go to the tip.
8. Declutter the whole house so that my house looks neat for an hour or two
9. Add as much of the 'clutter' items to eBay so that I make a bit of cash from all my hard work.
10. Actually use the Wii Fit that I brought for me and is actually only used by my husband and kids.
11. Feel incredibly productive...and a bit smug.

Here is what is actually going to happen:

1. Take eldest daughter to school
2. Get home, make a lovely filter coffee
3. Catch up on all things Sky+ that husband doesn't like - House & Fringe.
4. More Coffee
5. Puruse Sky Anytime to see what films are on - watch films
6. Get Coffee
7. Take long bath. Read book in bath, maybe have little nap
8. Tidy up a bit, put some laundry away. More Coffee.
9. Fetch daughter from school
10. Complain to husband about how little time I have and yawn for effect.
11. Feel a little bit useless and very lazy and unsmug.

Music that remind you of smells

I would first like to apologise profusely, apparently it was Goldfinger with the Laser and Blofeld who had the cat. There he is there..How I could have got him confused with Doctor No, who in fairness looks nothing like him, I don't know.

Anyway onwards and upwards. Today I have been thinking about music that reminds you of smell, Sheryl Crow's ,Run Baby Run', reminds me of the smell of coffee and toast...Is this only me??

Radiohead's 'Street Spirit', smells of burning plastic & the Prodigy's 'Smack your Bit*h up' reminds me of the smell of new magazines. So am I weird or is this normal?