A Rant and a Realisation

Yep, it's happened again. I am too cross to keep it in and I need a rant.

• I am sick of the people's head going to one side
• Their eye's getting wider
• And saying...'How are you?' The emphasis being on the word 'are' and the R in are).

Now I realise that they are just being nice - but I have seen it too many times this last couple of weeks. I am not telling you I am sick because I want your pity or your sympathy. I am telling you because you are close to me and it is now a part of me. Or, you need to know for Health and Safety reasons (work).

Last night I told two old friends and watched them simultaneously burst into tears. Dear Lord. I then spent the rest of the evening trying to cheer them up and doing all my best cancer jokes, one of them was physically wincing at this. I know it's a lot to take in, but I have every intention of out living them all (cue evil genius laughter...Mwahahahahaha). I am, after all, having my blood cells mutated so potentially could be turning into spiderman.

So to all of you who read this, I really appreciate your kind thoughts and prayers (keep them coming..I need all the help I can get), but don't treat me differently. I am still me. I am not dead yet. And I really have appreciated all your lovely comments on my blog.

OK that was number one. I know, you thought that was it didn't you...Oh no not at all.

Why oh why oh why do people of my age (40 ish....) seem to fall into two categories. Those who love technology and those who hate it. I am a lover - obviously, but same two friends - who won't be reading this as they are haters (as they say in those rap songs*) are not..

Now it's not that they don't like it - it is that they are so black and white about it. There is no grey. None.

Basically the internet and any form of social media is the devil's work. They should burn me for a witch for knowing how to use it.

In fairness, one of them has a daughter who had a dreadful internet bullying situation and this has effected her view, but she has just shut down to it all. She doesn't want to know about anything social media, or how it works. I tried talking to her about parental controls and nanny software, but she wanted no part of it.

It felt like ignorance....

And whilst I have been typing this I have realised why I am so grumpy. I talked to my friends last night about my Leukaemia, but I also talked about my treatment and the really positive results it was having. All they heard was Leukaemia. Then we talked about social media - which I love and they stopped listening to me then too.

I feel like two of oldest friends don't trust me or listen to me. Have we changed so much that we no longer have anything in common, and see each other so infrequently that we don't actually know each other at all.

This makes me sadder than my disease.


*Said in posh radio 4 type voice